It was committed discreetly. . . .

April 13, 2011

IT IS THE LAST DAY OF CLASSES
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I never thought it would happen.


Nightmares of repeating the last week of classes over and over and over again.

 Not that I'm work free.

 Let's not lose complete control of ourselves.

 All it really means is that I'm no longer teaching as of 5.20 today.

 Exams, papers, theses all have to be read and graded.


Honours defense at the end of April.

 Conference paper to write. . .once I get the data analyzed.

 So no.


Not work free.


Nothing irritates me more than people who remark,


"Oh, it must be so nice to have your summers off."

 Probably.


I wouldn't know.


I'm teaching Intersession. Two classes. One in the morning, 9.00-11.20 and the other in the afternoon, 1.00-4.00.


For almost the entire month of May.

 Three weeks vacation.

 That's what I get.

 

And of that I may take one week.

A couple of day trips here and there.

 

Otherwise, its me and my office everyday over the summer.

But if you find someone who gets the entire summer off, let me know.

 

I'd like to meet them.

I don't normally keep things from Stephen.

 Unless it is in his best interest that I do so.

 Planning and executing this party without him knowing took energies I hadn't planned for.

Didn't know I had, even.

 Sneaking around while he's in his night class putting together invitations, hoping he doesn't finish early and inadvertently walk in while I am in the midst of licking envelopes.

 

Covering up for the two invitations that came back because they possessed the wrong address.

From the address book maintained by Stephen.

Going downtown on a weekday, with the kids, something I rarely if ever do, and then covering up when he asks me why I was downtown.

 Agonizing.


And, to be frank, I am a good liar.

 But that doesn't mean I like doing it.

 At least not all the time.

The Day of Stephen's Surprise Party

That morning I was up at 6.00 am.

Kids had to be present and accounted for at a staff meeting, so I worked in my office while they did whatever they do at staff meetings and Stephen was blissfully oblivious, at home, sleeping, snoring, happily visiting the Land of Nod.

After the staff meeting the errands began.

Dollar Store for decorations.

Em wanted to essentially buy every decoration they had, including an odd assortment of party favours like plastic jewelry and hats.

We settled for balloons and streamers.

Next, the liquor store.

Boxes of wine were purchased.

I don't know wine very well.

That's more Stephen's department.

But I couldn't very well ask him, now could I?

So I went to the wine section, got four boxes of wine, two white, two red, and hoped for the best.

Then, downtown for the cake.

When I saw it, I almost fainted.

It was HUGE.

Remember, I am spatially challenged.

So when the bakery employee showed me how big the cake was, I didn't necessarily understand what she was saying.

I just smiled and nodded and paid.

At the bakery, I was confronted, again, with the repercussions of being spatially challenged.

They didn't actually have a box big enough for it, so while we waited for them to fashion one out of box lids, bakery customers kept coming over to comment on the cake,

"I hope someone loves me that much when I turn 50!"

"He must really love cake. Or he has a lot of friends. Or both!"

"OH MY GAWD! What a beautiful cake!"

It was so big, and so heavy, I had to go back to the car and move it closer to the bakery as Em and Keith carried it out.

I thought I'd just put it in the Staff fridge, down the hall from where the party was being held.

The cake was wider than the fridge.

All I could think of was to beg and plead with the cafeteria staff to house this monolith until that evening.

They were most gracious about putting the cake in their walk in fridge.

Otherwise, I don't know what I would have done.

Really.





By this time, it was 2.00 pm and I was exhausted.

And there was still a party to attend.

Home we went.

And I had a nap.

I had to.

Otherwise I would have been face down in Black Forest Cake that evening.

Which would have been interesting but not necessarily appropriate.

I asked Stephen to get me up for 4.00, so I could get ready for our dinner date.

That was the plan.

Out for dinner.

Some subterfuge to get him on campus.

And then the commencement of the partying.

But he didn't get me up until 4.30.

I was ready very quickly.

Hence, not looking as good as perhaps I could have.

Because of the let's-find-a-place-for-dinner-schomozzle Friday evening, I didn't want to take any chances that we wouldn't be finished on time, so we left earlier than we usually would to go for dinner.

Meaning we were at the restaurant by 5.00 pm.

I felt like my parents.

But early hour aside, it was very good.

We treated ourselves to a beer.

Fredericton has this absolutely fabulous microbrewery, Picaroons: http://www.picaroons.ca/index.asp

Their Irish Red ale is divine! (http://www.picaroons.ca/products_red.asp)

And I had me some.

Stephen had one of their lighter ales.

The name escapes me.

Stephen has the pistachio encrusted salmon.

I had the New York strip loin, rare.

Stephen even tried a piece of my steak.

The man who likes his beef to taste like shoe leather.

I think I may have converted him to the gloriousness that is the rare steak.

Hallelujah!

Dinner was over and done with by 6.00 pm.

We weren't to get to the party before 7.00 pm.

So we did what any couple, out on a Saturday night would do if they had some time on their hands.

We went for a walk.

But I hadn't brought shoes for walking, so that lasted only 30 minutes.

And then I did the only other thing I could think of at that moment.

Drove around Fredericton, looking at our favourite houses.

Meanwhile, I am trying to drive while getting all sorts of texts and phone calls from the kids about what was going on at the party.

April 1st Fredericton passed a new bylaw that it is illegal to drive and be on your cell phone at the same time.

Normally, I would have just passed the phone to Stephen and asked him to relay the conversation.

Not this time.

A multitasker I am, but, not necessarily when I'm driving.

I know some women can put on make up and drive.

Not me.

One, I don't wear makeup.

Two, if I tried applying it while driving, I'd look like Bozo the Clown when I got to where ever I was going.

I had informed Stephen, during dinner, that I had left some papers in my office and needed to go to campus to get them.
THAT is certainly nothing out of the ordinary, as I am always leaving things here and having to come and get them.

My office is on the 4th floor.

The party was on the 3rd.

No problem.

I said I had to pee.

We don't have a bathroom on the 4th floor, so we had to stop on the 3rd.

Then, I said we should check out the Rotunda to see if there was anything leftover from my book launch, in the same room, the day before.
He walked in.

And then. . . .

SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is his face upon entering the Rotunda in Brian Mulroney Hall.

Stephen, me and a good friend of ours. I'm the one in the red. And remember, I've lost 65 pounds. Imagine what I looked like before.

I don't know what I was doing here. Gazing longingly into my love's eyes?????

Stephen blowing out the candles on his massive cake. The young man in the green is my son, Keith. The beautiful young woman in the left hand corner, with the glasses is my daughter, Emily.

Em was drafted to serve as Head Cake Cutter. Isn't that cake gorgeous! And it tasted as good as it looked. I know. Atonement for cake eating was Monday morning at SFL.

The other question, of course, is where is Miss Meredyth?

She was there.

But in true Mer style she arrived after all the work was done.

We'll tackle that tomorrow.

 

Title Lyric: Surprises by Billy Joel